Effective Date: 1ST JUNE 2025
Absurd Health
📧 support@absurdhealth.com
📞 7077-ABSURD

1. Overview

At Absurd Health, we are honored to bring you spiritually aligned, life-giving products—from healing foods and custom powders to biblical supplements and printed materials. Many of our items are shipped directly from farms or crafted in small batches, reflecting our commitment to purity and excellence.

Because of our global sourcing and decentralized fulfillment model, delivery times and packaging standards may vary. This policy explains how we ship, what you can expect, and how to request help if issues arise.

2. Global Fulfillment Model

We partner with regional farms, formulators, and warehouses across the U.S. and internationally. This enables us to offer truly rare and powerful healing products—but also means:

• Orders may arrive in multiple shipments from different sources

• Some items may arrive quickly, others may take longer (especially from rural or overseas partners)

• Estimated delivery dates are guidelines, not guarantees

You may receive tracking numbers for each parcel separately. Please allow adequate time for all components of your order to arrive before submitting an inquiry.

3. Perishable Products (Farm-to-Table, Frozen, or Fresh)

We take extensive care to package farm-based goods in insulated, frozen, or protected formats when required. However:

• We cannot guarantee perfect condition upon arrival due to shipping delays, weather, or carrier error

• We strongly encourage you to select the fastest available shipping option for any fresh or frozen item

• We are not responsible for items spoiled due to:

  • Delayed pickup from porch/mailbox

  • Shipping carrier delay once in transit

  • Inaccurate address provided at checkout

  • Failure to select an appropriate shipping speed

If you receive a damaged perishable item, please email us within 24 hours of delivery with photos and a description so we can assess and advise.

4. Processing & Fulfillment Times

Most non-perishable orders are processed within 2–4 business days, unless otherwise noted. However:

• Handmade, farm-sourced, or small-batch items may require 5–10 days or longer to fulfill

• Custom powders or fasting kits may ship weekly rather than daily

• During sales, launches, or holiday seasons, processing times may increase

We aim for transparency at every stage. You’ll receive an email with tracking information when your order ships. If multiple packages are involved, each will be listed.

5. Shipping Options & Carrier Responsibility

You will be given a choice of shipping options at checkout. You are responsible for selecting the shipping method best suited to your location and order contents.

Once a package has left our facility and is in the hands of a third-party carrier (e.g., USPS, UPS, FedEx, DHL), we cannot:

• Control shipping delays, misroutes, or customs inspections

• Guarantee delivery by a specific date

• Accept liability for items lost, damaged, or delayed in transit

International Orders may be subject to customs duties, import taxes, or clearance delays, which are the responsibility of the customer.

6. Incorrect Address or Undeliverable Packages

Please ensure your address is entered correctly at checkout. We are not responsible for:

• Lost or delayed packages due to incorrect or incomplete addresses

• Shipments returned to sender due to address errors

• Missed deliveries when the carrier attempted delivery and no one was available

If a package is returned to us due to incorrect address, we can reship it at your expense or refund the order minus original shipping charges and any spoilage loss (if applicable).

7. Missing or Damaged Items

If you are missing part of your order, please check your tracking emails to confirm whether multiple shipments were used.

If your item was damaged in transit, notify us within 3 business days of delivery with:

• Your order number

• Description of the issue

• Clear photos of the damage

We will investigate and, if appropriate, issue a replacement, credit, or refund at our discretion.

8. Delays Beyond Our Control (Force Majeure)

Absurd Health is not liable for delays or fulfillment issues caused by:

• Natural disasters or extreme weather

• Global supply chain disruptions

• Political unrest or war

• Customs or import/export restrictions

• Acts of God or spiritual warfare (we say that lovingly)

We commit to do our best and pray for excellence in every shipment—but we also walk humbly, knowing not all circumstances are within our control.

9. Customer Service & Follow-Up

We’re here to help. If something seems off, please reach out—calmly and kindly. We will do everything we can to make it right.

📧 support@absurdhealth.com
📞 7077-ABSURD
🕒 Mon–Fri | 9am–5pm EST